In what may or may not be a joke (after reading the press release, we can't decide), Mitsubishi has announced it will attempt to aid the recovery of New Zealand's economy by offering free goats with purchases of its Triton pickup trucks.
"In a drive to help the rural community stave off the recession," the release begins, "Mitsubishi Motors is supporting primary productivity by offering a free goat with every new Triton sold before August."
Mitsubishi's general manager of sales and marketing in New Zealand, Peter Wilkins, goes on to make the inevitable comparison between the goat and the Triton. "Goats, like our Tritons, are hardy, versatile units which will integrate directly into existing farm operations."
According to Wilkins, there's been a three-year drought on New Zealand that has depleted goat populations on the island. In case you are unaware of the virtues of goats, he also provides a fairly thorough explanation.
"Goats improve farm productivity by providing an environmentally friendly defense against noxious weeds and they're a lot cheaper than toxic sprays.
"Goats also provide export commodities that can help improve our balance of payments. They grow a fine micron fleece, much like the renowned Merino, which can be used to produce high-quality garments. Goat's milk provides a nutritious alternative for the growing number of lactose intolerant people and while goat meat is seldom featured in Western restaurants, developing countries consume vast quantities."
And as Wilkins points out, "most importantly, there is no such thing as Goat Flu -- so no threat to tourism."
For those crazy New Zealanders who would decline a goat with the purchase of their truck, Mitsubishi has a different offer.
"On the off chance that the purchaser already has enough goats or feels that goat herding is better left to those in drier climes, we'll supply a 'no goat package' consisting of a five-year/100,000-kilometer extended warranty, five free WOF inspections, 5,000-kilometer road user charges, five years of roadside assistance and $500 of genuine or approved Triton accessories."
We wonder if the "approved Triton accessories" include any goat-related items.